Short Sentences and the Case for Cutting the Fat

Long sentences aren't more sophisticated. They're usually just less edited. A sentence that runs forty words is often three ideas wearing one trench coat, and the fix isn't better vocabulary, it's separation.

Take this: "Due to the fact that the company experienced a significant decline in revenue during the third quarter, which was primarily attributable to increased competition in the marketplace, management made the decision to implement a series of cost-cutting measures." That's one sentence carrying a cause, a reason, and a response. Split it: "Revenue fell sharply in the third quarter, mostly because of new competitors. Management responded with a round of cost cuts." Same information, half the words, and the reader isn't holding three clauses in their head waiting for the main verb.

Where the Padding Comes From

Most bloated sentences trace back to a handful of specific habits: "due to the fact that" instead of "because," "in order to" instead of "to," "a large number of" instead of "many." None of these are wrong exactly, but they add friction without adding meaning, and cutting them is usually the fastest editing pass you can make. The Purdue OWL's guide to concise academic writing treats this kind of trimming as a distinct editing pass from checking grammar, because it requires reading for redundancy rather than correctness.

A Mini Scenario

You've written a paragraph you're proud of, dense with qualifications and subordinate clauses, the kind of sentence that feels impressive while you're typing it. Read it aloud. If you run out of breath before the period, a reader's attention has probably already wandered off somewhere around clause two. Break it at the point where you naturally paused for air.

When Length Is Actually Fine

This isn't a rule against long sentences categorically. A longer sentence works when it's carrying one continuous thought that genuinely needs the room, building toward a single point rather than juggling several. The problem is never length by itself, it's length without a clear reason for it. If you can't explain why a sentence needs to be that long, it probably doesn't.

A Quick Test

Read your paragraph and count how many times you use "which," "that," or a comma followed by a new clause. More than two or three per sentence is a sign you're stacking ideas instead of separating them. UNC's writing resources recommend reading a dense draft aloud specifically to catch this, since the ear notices exhaustion faster than the eye does. And if a sentence is carrying a direct quote or paraphrase from a source, keep UNC's paraphrasing guide in mind too, since a paraphrased idea crammed into an already-long sentence is usually the first thing that gets garbled.

Word choice matters here as well. Swapping "utilize" for "use," or "commence" for "start," trims length without losing meaning, a distinction Merriam-Webster is worth checking if you're ever unsure whether a shorter word actually means the same thing. For a broader sense of how concision fits into academic style overall, the Purdue OWL's general writing index is a reasonable place to browse other editing habits worth building.

Cutting words isn't about making your writing simpler. It's about making sure every word left is actually doing something.